The Princess Bride
Grandpa came over to read
A story his grandson would need
To take his mind off
His sneezes and coughs
The grandson said fin'lly "Proceed"...
There once was a woman named Buttercup
Who's admirer's heart would just flutter up
He'd say "As you wish"
And hand her a dish
And Buttercup started to pucker up
This girl heard her Westley was killed
But Roberts had taught him his skills
And the girl would become
A princess to scum
As Humperdinck's bride 'gainst her will
Then Vizzini at Humperdinck's bidding
Stole the bride to some cliffs so forbidding
But as Fezzik climbed
There came from behind
A man in black mask who ain't kidding
At the top the masked man met a guy
Who asked him 'bout six fingers, why?
But soon they would fight
Their swords quite a sight
And the masked man would win by and by
Then the masked man continued his quest
But encountered a giant-sized test
But he was too quick
And because he was slick
Put the giant down there for a rest
But then came a battle of minds
With Vizzini and powder so fine
Then died Wallace Shawn
So the masked man had won
'Gainst a Cecelian with death on the line
The masked man revealed his true face
Then 'Cup and her Westley embraced
But Humperdinck came
To hunt down his dame
And after the lovers gave chase
In the Fire Swamp there were such messes
Where quicksand and fire depresses
But Westley, so brave
His woman would save
From terrible R.O.U.S.'s
But Westley and 'Cup were soon parted
To Pit of Despair he was carted
While Buttercup paced
'Round the whole castle place
That showed she was super down-hearted
Through torture our Westley was placed
But Humperdinck picked up the pace
The machine, oh so nifty
Was pushed up to fifty
And sucked all the life from his face
But Inigo and his dear friend
Found Westley and tried to amend
Their deeds with Vizzini
Who thought their brains teeny
And up from the Pit they ascend
They took the near-dead man in black
To see the man Miracle Max
The pill that he gave
Saved Westley from grave
Then off to the castle made tracks
Humperdinck's wedding was on
The conclusion was all but forgone
The words like a knife
Were said "Man and Wife"
It felt like the bad guys had won
In her chambers dear Buttercup sighed
To take her own life there she tried
But do not despair
For Westley was there
And into his arms fell the bride
"My name is Inigo Montoya
We met when I was just a boy-a
Then you killed my dad
It made me so mad
So it's time for me now to destroy ya"
Back in the Princess's chambers
Humperdinck came up to maim her
But Westley would scare
Humperdinck to a chair
With Buttercup glad, who could blame her
The friends now were fully united
They were done with their tasks and excited
When Fezzik found horses
They all set their courses
For home and they all were delighted
Westley and Buttercup kissed
And grandpa stood up with a swish
The story was done
"More!" said grandson
Of course, he replied "As you wish"
A story his grandson would need
To take his mind off
His sneezes and coughs
The grandson said fin'lly "Proceed"...
There once was a woman named Buttercup
Who's admirer's heart would just flutter up
He'd say "As you wish"
And hand her a dish
And Buttercup started to pucker up
This girl heard her Westley was killed
But Roberts had taught him his skills
And the girl would become
A princess to scum
As Humperdinck's bride 'gainst her will
Then Vizzini at Humperdinck's bidding
Stole the bride to some cliffs so forbidding
But as Fezzik climbed
There came from behind
A man in black mask who ain't kidding
At the top the masked man met a guy
Who asked him 'bout six fingers, why?
But soon they would fight
Their swords quite a sight
And the masked man would win by and by
Then the masked man continued his quest
But encountered a giant-sized test
But he was too quick
And because he was slick
Put the giant down there for a rest
But then came a battle of minds
With Vizzini and powder so fine
Then died Wallace Shawn
So the masked man had won
'Gainst a Cecelian with death on the line
The masked man revealed his true face
Then 'Cup and her Westley embraced
But Humperdinck came
To hunt down his dame
And after the lovers gave chase
In the Fire Swamp there were such messes
Where quicksand and fire depresses
But Westley, so brave
His woman would save
From terrible R.O.U.S.'s
But Westley and 'Cup were soon parted
To Pit of Despair he was carted
While Buttercup paced
'Round the whole castle place
That showed she was super down-hearted
Through torture our Westley was placed
But Humperdinck picked up the pace
The machine, oh so nifty
Was pushed up to fifty
And sucked all the life from his face
But Inigo and his dear friend
Found Westley and tried to amend
Their deeds with Vizzini
Who thought their brains teeny
And up from the Pit they ascend
They took the near-dead man in black
To see the man Miracle Max
The pill that he gave
Saved Westley from grave
Then off to the castle made tracks
Humperdinck's wedding was on
The conclusion was all but forgone
The words like a knife
Were said "Man and Wife"
It felt like the bad guys had won
In her chambers dear Buttercup sighed
To take her own life there she tried
But do not despair
For Westley was there
And into his arms fell the bride
"My name is Inigo Montoya
We met when I was just a boy-a
Then you killed my dad
It made me so mad
So it's time for me now to destroy ya"
Back in the Princess's chambers
Humperdinck came up to maim her
But Westley would scare
Humperdinck to a chair
With Buttercup glad, who could blame her
The friends now were fully united
They were done with their tasks and excited
When Fezzik found horses
They all set their courses
For home and they all were delighted
Westley and Buttercup kissed
And grandpa stood up with a swish
The story was done
"More!" said grandson
Of course, he replied "As you wish"